i bet a lot of dinosaurs did really cute stuff like play around and roll around on the ground and catch flies in the air and sneeze and bump into stuff and fall down and play in the water and snuggle up close to each other when they were cold
i want more people to imagine them as just regular animals
i touched a dick once and it was the scariest thing in my life because it had a really cold head and i don’t know it wasn’t fun
sometimes the ‘i’ and ‘u’ shouldn’t be so close on the keyboard
HI
I am the potoo
I spend most of my time sitting on the edges of tree branches,
pretending to be a stick or dead leaf
it’s not as easy as it looks
I sing virtually exclusively around the period of the full moon
because, according to legend,
I am a mournful spirit in love with the spirit of the moon
I approve of this so much.
The idea that people had sex before the 20th century really freaks me out. Like George Washington probably got a blow job and that makes me uncomfortable.
I just realized that “pun intended” is a pun on “unintended” and I’m literally about to gouge my eyes out I’m so angry
This. Changes. Everything.
I don’t give a damn about my reputation [LOUD GUITAR]
You’re living in the past it’s a new generation
[LOUD GUITAR]
[SHREK ATTACKS THE KNIGHTS AT LORD FARQUAD’S CASTLE]













